National Forest Gnome + The Crooked Cottage | True Strange Stories from Reddit | Ep #18

0:01 If you have a true strange story you'd like to hear narrated on the show, submit it now on madamstrangeways.com or e-mail it to madamstrangeways@gmail.com. That's MAD. AM E Well, hello, my little strange Ling. It's me, Madam Strangeways, with two new true strange stories of the unexplained paranormal. Or just kind of spooky. And as always, solicited or not, usually not, I share my insights and observations.

0:41 After each spooky tale. Now it's time to dim the lights and get cozy while I. Read you these. True strange stories here on Madam Strange Ways. The Crooked Cottage by Aaron When I was a kid, my parents would take my sister and I to this farm out in the country near where we lived to chop down our Christmas trees.

1:29 The farm was about a 40 minute drive from the little town we lived in and it was a Christmas tradition. That we loved. We went to the same farm every year and one of those years we had a strange experience together. One year, I believe I was around 13 or 14 at the time, on our way to the farm, we came upon this house that we had never seen before. It was bizarre looking, almost like. The Weasleys. House in Harry. Potter, but. More colorful, It was tall and thin, like every floor was a single room stacked on top.

2:13 Of each other. And it looked like it was built out of a mishmash of materials, like some parts were made of wood and some parts were made of metal. It had filigree on the trim and everything was painted. Bright pastel colors. Pinks, yellows, purples, mint cream. My dad slowed the car down to get a good look at it. I remember looking down at the house from the road. It was in almost a bowl shaped patch of land surrounded by trees. There was smoke coming from the chimney and lights on inside and we just sat and looked at it for a while, muttering.

2:58 To each other. We had driven this road every year. For probably. 10 years at that point and had never. Once. Seen this place? It was so fantastical looking. It seemed like the kind of place everyone would know and talk about. In our small community. Eventually we continued to the farm and went about the rest of our day, but later that night I had a vivid dream that we had stopped and been invited inside the house by a short, very sweet older woman. The inside was as wacky as the outside. We've never stopped talking about that day. We all remember seeing the house, we all describe it the same way and where it was on the road, but we've never been able to find it again.

3:56 It should be noticeable. Since most. Of the houses. Out in that. Area are log cabins, trailers, or old farm houses. It looked nothing like any house I've seen before aside from in picture books. We've purposely gone looking for it, taking twisty back roads through the woods to try and see it again. My dad was an urban planner for one of the transportation companies in the area, so he's obsessed with roads and maps and he took us many times to try and find the house. But we've. Never seen it. Again, we've even asked people in the area if they've seen the house but no one knows what we're talking about. I'm semi convinced we entered some sort of time slip or dimension slip.

4:51 I'm the only one that thinks that I'm the less logical one in the family. The rest of my family thinks we just lost our minds for about an hour one day. Just thought I'd share this weird and mystical experience. Aaron, I think what you may have encountered was actually Howl's Moving Castle. Mystery solved. Thank you so much for submitting your story. Wow, I wish it was Howl's Moving Castle. And if you haven't read the book, I'm going to try to not give any spoilers. If you haven't read the book, it's not outside the realm of possibility that that could actually have been Howl's Moving Castle if he was real.

5:44 The reason I like this story so much is that a car full of people who are really familiar with this route all saw this house and then never saw it again. And you know the fact that your dad is like a planner and knows not only the insurance and outs, but like how to find where this house could have possibly come from and it just isn't there. Oh, that's so spooky. There's OK in folklore and mythology you've got some instances of places that are disappearing, like, well, this isn't really either of them. But Brigadoon is a Broadway musical turned movie about a Scottish village that disappears every and reappears.

6:32 OK, it disappears. Then every 100 years it reappears. Now that's not actually based on folklore from what I could find in my research, but then there actually is, you know, King Arthur. King Arthur, the island of Avalon can be hidden at will, so that can just appear to disappear. It can appear. To disappear to normies like you and your family. No offense, but you know King Arthur legend. They wouldn't want you to see it. So generally when you've. Got villages that are disappearing, and I mean villages like towns, not just one house, but typically when you have villages or towns that are disappearing in folklore, generally it's because they have angered the gods or God.

7:24 Some. Deity is pissed and. The the the. Town folk have pissed said deity off and so the deity either snaps her fingers or causes a flood or something horrible happens and that's why you see these towns disappear. So probably it's not that I don't hate the idea of a wizard or a witch being involved. She came down in a. Bubble. Dog, I don't hate that idea of, you know, like coming back to the to the Arthurian legend, you know, maybe there's a wizard and he's hiding the house from you because you're not supposed to see it. You weren't supposed to see it the first time. That was an oops, that was that was his bad. Maybe maybe it's that, you know, you've also got glamour. You know, I kind of mentioned the fae last episode. You know, you could have some sort of fae glamour situation and that does kind of jive with a with like a fairy house. I mean, I don't think typically fairies do houses. They have like rings and like mushrooms. But if a fairy did make a house, it would be kind of like rooms stacked on one one another and it wouldn't make any sense, right?

8:38 It just feels like again, fairies, if you're listening, I'm such a big fan of yours. Please leave me alone. Of course, then there's just ghosts, ghosts, curses, etcetera. Hauntings that it was some trap. That. Has been laid for unsuspecting people driving by and you guys passed. You didn't stop. But if you had stopped and gone into the house like that dream that you had, it probably wouldn't have been a nice little old lady who gave you cookies. It probably would have been an evil ghost lady who gave you poison cookies. And then you would never wake up. So good job not falling for that cursed trap. I'm I applaud you.

9:28 But I think. It's totally fair that, barring any other logical explanation, that you go to the fantastical and that you go. The only other way that I can explain this is that somehow time and space broke all of the rules that we as humans are aware of and allowed us to shift into a different time. I know that it's there's, there's, where is it? Liverpool? In Liverpool, you've got, oh, where is it? I'm going to have to look it up. In Liverpool, there are time slips that are common in a certain area of the town. I'm, I'm just this is memory. This is memory.

10:10 I have not read about this recently, so please, if I'm wrong, correct me. But I do remember hearing lots of stories of time slips happening in Liverpool where someone just walks out of a shop and then suddenly they're in like 1960 and they're really confused and disoriented. And then they turn a corner and then suddenly everything is back to being the modern way. And enough stories like that are happening that, OK, what's going on here? So, you know, was it a time slip? Was it a dimension slip? And then you guys went back to the normal dimension or did you? But then I guess there's also, there's also the possibility that you did take a weird way and that maybe there was some kind of weird installation, some kind of art installation, perhaps that was taken down or maybe one of you has misremembered and then told the story and then now all of you remember the story.

11:11 I know that that sounds far fetched, OK. But like, OK, is it more far fetched than a dimension hopping? You know, I don't know you'd be the judge. But I do know I can tell you this. Every single time we access our memories, they are overwritten. And sometimes they're overwritten with new different, now incorrect information. So something that you think you remember was such alarming clarity may not even be right anymore. Which is honestly kind of more terrifying than seeing a building that you can never see again and that you can't find again, and that you really can't prove ever existed even though multiple people saw it. To me, I feel like they're equally if not if not more terrifying to know that maybe none of my memories are accurate in any way, but especially ones that you re access over and over.

12:04 Otherwise, my money's on a wizard, my money's on a wizard or a curse or both. Wizards can do curses, so maybe a wizard cursed the house, tried to trick you, you did not fall for it. And then? Someone else? Fell for the curse and now they're trapped in the wizard cursed dimension, but not. You. Because you're too smart. I don't even know how to say this, but I think I saw a gnome in a National Forest yesterday by Anonymous.

12:52 I will be the first to admit I thought these types of cryptids were a joke and not real and I've never been able to take them seriously. I am an outdoorsman and have been for 35 years. I grew up in the woods. I memorize trees for mushroom hunting for a living. I know every brook, stream, Bush, Berry Grove, log, you name it. I'm on a Forest Rd. and I'm on hour 9 of Not a Soul Insight. I gather some. Mushrooms and look up the road and see a rock has fallen from the loose steep side of the mountain to the middle of the road. I make a mental note that I have to move it and not drive over it.

13:46 I gather my mushrooms and get back to the car. I look up. And I see what appears to. Be a 2 or 2 1/2 foot tall. Little brown thing. Walking from the side of the road over to the rock, my first logical thought is that it is a squirrel, but I see it is walking on 2. Legs appears to be wearing brown cloth. Or fur clothes and is shaped like a human but very tiny. It's not scurrying either, it is ambling on 2 legs like a human would.

14:29 Just casually walking like this is some normal regular ass thing. Like monotonous work it does for a living. I don't believe my lying eyes, it has to be something else. I get back in the car and head up the road and see that the rock has been pushed back to the side of the road from whence it came. It had fallen off the hill, rolled to my left, then was sitting back on the other side of the road on the right. There are drag marks like someone slid it back. I look, I smell, I sense, I listen.

15:12 Nothing. I don't know where gnomes live, but the old partially logged section where I. Was looked pretty. Perfect for a clan of these things. Lots of places to hide secluded. Near water? Plenty. Of routes of escape and would be easy to dig little holes in the mountain and be fortified against invaders. The side Rd. into it was flooded and appears to do so regularly so these little guys even have their own Moat. I'm positive I'm overthinking this.

15:52 It was a. Long drive back up the mountain, then down the mountain the other way and some time home and I can't pick this apart into anything else. But being a tiny little forest. Man, I'm like 1000% positive that I saw what I saw. It was. Near a military special interest. Zone. Allegedly blocked off due to some native butterflies, but I'm starting to wonder. If this research. Area is really about butterflies after all. They send you to prison, ban you from parks, and give. You a 5. $1000 fine if you take a single Berry from inside that boundary.

16:56 Anonymous, thank you so much I. Cannot even imagine how you must have felt seeing a tiny human wearing fur or clothes. You know, like I remember playing. I remember, I remember playing Final Fantasy ages ago and there would just be these crazy monsters around and they'd be wearing a bunch of belts and they would. Have weapons and sometimes. They wouldn't have arms. And I remember thinking who is outfitting these creatures with armor and clothes? Who's doing this?

17:40 So I would ask the same question, who is outfitting these? Gnomes. Out in the forest. And I think you're right. You know how how you're like, oh, apparently it's about some kind of rare butterfly. That's why it's illegal for you to take berries from this part in the forest, right. Well, maybe butterflies is the government code word for gnomes or as we're about to get into possibly little people specifically from indigenous American folklore. So you've got the Comanche, you've got Iroquois, and you've got Cherokee. So all of those tribes, at the very least from my research, all had stories about little people, quote UN quote. So OK, let me let me tell you why. Let me tell you why I've pivoted here and away from gnomes. So first of all, gnomes are apparently two spans tall. Now what is a span, you ask?

18:48 Is this like, is this like America trying to use literally any other form of measurement other than the metric system? No, the A span, when you're talking about measurement, is the length of two hands from the tip of the thumb to the pinky. It's a diagonal line. If you spread your fingers fully out all the way, then you measure from your tip of your thumb to the tip of your pinky finger. That is 1 span. So your span is going to be different than mine. But I. Measured it. And to me, a gnome is going to be about 16 inches tall. Maybe.

19:28 That's on the small end. So if you're talking about 16 inches, that's not close enough to 2 or 2 1/2 feet. To me, I don't think that's close enough in measurement. I know you are really close, I know you're just estimating, but to me a gnome is too small. A gnome is too small for what you saw. In my estimation. So, you know, what isn't too small is the little people of the indigenous American folklore. Those two to two to three feet. I've read two. I've read 3. I think maybe that might be what you saw. I guess it depends on exactly where you were, which National Park you were in.

20:12 However, regardless of which National Park you are in, regardless of what forest you are ever in, if there are little people in that forest, then you need to be asking permission before you go in. You also should probably be giving an offering. I read I think it was Cherokee tradition that you should. Give some tobacco. Give him some tobacco, because apparently little people haven't got the memo that people use vapes now. So maybe you could use a vape. You could probably put a vape down. I don't know, maybe they're not into that. Maybe it would have to be a little vape, probably a big vape. That might be why they want tobacco is if you gave them like a human sized vape that would kill them.

20:55 So probably, you know, I'm going to go back. Don't give them any vapes. Just do straight tobacco tobaccy. Give them some of that before you go into their forest. Also, if you find something in the forest, like a little trinket, like you find a knife. You find a knife on the floor of the forest, the forest floor and you think, wow, someone dropped a knife. This is a nice knife. I think I want to take this knife home with me because finders keepers maybe don't do that until you ask permission of the little people. And if they don't tell you no, then I guess then it's fine. But if you take it without asking permission, they're going to. Throw rocks at you instead of moving. Rocks out of the road, out of your way, which was super nice of that one creature.

21:42 Whatever it is to have done, instead of moving rocks out of your way, they're going to be throwing those rocks at you, probably at your head, probably. They have really good aim too. So just keep that in mind. What I do love though, about this creature, whether it was a gnome or whether it was a little person, what I do love is that like, it sounds like you both were just out in the forest doing your jobs. Like their job is keeping rocks out of the road. I don't know why that would be their job. I mean, I guess they're trying to keep you safe, which is really nice of them, but maybe they just like a tidy forest. Maybe they have. Slight obsessive tendencies and and. Rocks in the road really just kind of puts them in a bad mood for the rest of the day.

22:32 Whatever it was. They were out there doing their job and you were out there doing your job and you both just kind of happened to cross paths with each other. I can respect that, that both of you are just out there living your life and I wonder. If. They went home to their partner and they were like, Oh my gosh, you're totally not going to believe what I just saw out in the forest today. You're going to think I'm crazy. It it was like us, but it was like 6 feet tall and it had these like weird blue pants on and it had this. Rectangle in its. Hand that glowed like the noonday sun. And maybe that's what it went home. That's what they went home to and told their partner how strange you looked and how now, now they're a pariah in their community because they were talking about the crazy thing that they saw.

23:30 I don't think you're crazy. You know, if we were talking about what a logical explanation is, even though you're 1000% sure that you saw what you saw. Maybe, maybe if we were talking about a mundane explanation, maybe there's dehydration involved, which can cause, you know, confusion and possibly hallucinations that, you know, I love hallucinations. If you listen to the show, I love talking about hallucinations. But you did. See the the marks in the ground where the rock had clearly been dragged away. So unless it's some sort of animal that you like, a furry brown animal that just looked like it was wearing clothes. Maybe it was wearing clothes.

24:15 Maybe it was a trained monkey that's been. Released into the. Wild and you just happen to see it. Keep me updated if you ever. See it again. Oh, and there. Are several gnome themed entertainment parks like amusement parks? There are gnome more than one in the world. OK, there's the GNOME reserve in North Devon, UK. There's GNOME land in Barry Narber also in the UK. That's, I don't know that I said that, right? It's fine. We're going to move on. You know where? Else they have. In the UK they have the Gnome Magic Garden at Colchester UK. Then if you go on across the pond to the US of A, you've got gnome town in.

25:03 TAWSON, Minnesota. You've got the Gnome village all the way over in the Netherlands, then you've got the Zwergen Park Trust tool in Germany in Trosatol. I don't know how to pronounce that in German. And then finally in Poland there is Gnomes Park, but it's spelled Gnom without an e.g. NOM so maybe it's Gnomes Park? In Poland, so. You can visit any one of those places and see if any of the depicted gnomes look like what you saw. Thank you SO.

25:48 Much for joining me for such a lovely spooky time. Remember, you can feel afraid and not. Be in danger. If you've enjoyed yourself, please follow the. Podcast so you can get alerts when new episodes come out and if you've really enjoyed. Yourself, It would mean a lot to me if you. Would tell a. Friend about. The podcast. And follow. Me on Instagram at Madam Strangeways or leave me a rating or review. On. Spotify or Apple Podcasts? Or I mean just send me an. E-mail at Madam Strangeways at. Gmail.com to just say hello.

26:28 I'd appreciate it. Madam Strangeways is produced and narrated by me. Madam Strangeways theme music is by Marina Ryan. At Marina makes. Dot Co You can submit your own strange story at madamstrangeways.com or send in your thoughts or theories on the stories in this episode to madamstrangeways@gmail.com. Thank you for. Listening until next time.

27:22 Gnome Gnome on the range where the deer. And the antelope. Lay and seldom misheard. And the gnomes are not. Cloudy all day meow meow meow.